"The pleasure of remembering was taken from me, because there was no longer anyone to remember with."(21.262) Hazel has to go through some incredibly difficult things, losing Augustus might possibly be the hardest. Losing the person you hold the dearest memories with, is almost like losing your memories. All the memories are in a different light now. She can never talk to Augustus about pedophilic swingsets or drinking the stars. He is just gone, and she has to live with it.