Funniest quotes ever

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Police: "You were going fast." Me: "I was trying to keep up with traffic." Police: "There isn't any." Me: "That's how far behind I am." - minions

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“@BeccaP1995 @1HawtChica @Sheugs @pjl24 @HintonAlisa @sarahjaswim @SamsSecretAlias @barbaramills1 LOL”

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Gag Dad | Spread Humour Over The World

'When you push a door that says pull and someone says 'you have to pull' like yea no my next plan was to start lifting from the bottom.'

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39 Totally HILARIOUS Parenting Stories Will Make You Pee Your Pants

I'm sure that waitress will be having nightmares for the next week.

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9 Hilarious Aziz Ansari Jokes That Prove He Just Gets Us

Aziz Ansari's stand-up is consistently on point. Whether he's explaining the insanity of marriage, describing Cold Stone Creamery as the "epitome ...

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Anyone who works in an airline and can explain this? - FunSubstance

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