This is a must read: Give your child boldness, security, and self confidence by speaking positive words of approval, encouragement, and love. 101 Words of Affirmation Every Child Wants to Hear - by Matthew L.
Moms tend to have an ideal in their heads of how they are going to mother and how their children are going to respond. What do you do when that idea doesn't match up to reality? Do you get mad, yell, nag, etc? Or do you offer understanding and love?