Femininity is inherently oppressive in a patriarchal society, no matter how media and mainstream liberal feminism attempt to construct it as empowering. Changing how we perceive our oppression doesn't make it a positive thing.
The fallacy of "I was out of control"--If you were really out of control, none of those reasons would have stopped you. You knew what you were doing, you just felt entitled to do it; but deep down you know it's not okay or you'd never have stopped to worry about what would happen to YOU if someone finds out. And it's never okay.