Apology to myself

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I apologize.
For not putting you first. 
For putting them first.
For making your worth dependent on how
they
saw
you.
For making their words more important than
yours.
For not allowing myself to forgive you or
to forgive me.
Forgive me.
For believing them when they said that
something was wrong with you.
Forgive me for not believing in you.
Forgive me for loving them more than loving you.
Forgive me for not loving you.

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I apologize. For not putting you first. For putting them first. For making your worth dependent on how they saw you. For making their words more important than yours. For not allowing myself to forgive you or to forgive me. Forgive me. For believing them when they said that something was wrong with you. Forgive me for not believing in you. Forgive me for loving them more than loving you. Forgive me for not loving you. My heart cries every time I read this.

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